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  • Writer's pictureElijah Ricks

Fun With Words

Avey has been doing a lot of work on words lately. Here’s a brief video to demonstrate some of her progress:


Notice how she can say the “duh” sound and the “k” sound, but won’t put them together to say “duck”. Also, her “duck” sounds a lot like her “dog” and sometimes she confuses “dog” and “daddy”. I try not to take offense though.

Sometimes I think Avey is just running experiments on us and is a better psychologist than I will ever be. I imagine that she wakes up from naps and, before making a sound, starts taking down notes in a wee little journal she keeps hidden from us. I imagine her entries going something like this:

September 14, 2008 – day 351 – I’ve decreased my father’s hours of consecutive sleep time to 4 and, thus far, he has shown decreased cognitive ability in almost all areas. He maintains simple tasks, but at key times of the day (particularly after meals) enters an almost zombie-like state, sometimes even drooling while staring off into space. These findings are most encouraging for my future plans to have complete control over him. Mother’s tolerance is much higher for lack of sleep, though she continues to demonstrate intriguing spouts of grumbling and shouting the longer I refuse to eat. Her behavior has become very predictable. Father will go to great lengths attempting to (what he calls) “distract” me while mother tries to feed me. He does things that would otherwise be considerably embarrassing. My next experiment will involve randomized bursts of mania coupled with almost simultaneous whining. Hypothesis – mother will attempt to put me down for a nap whilst father will attempt to cheer me up with one of his ridiculous games, then pull out the camcorder during a manic burst. Results to follow tomorrow.

She plays ignorant, but I’m slowly catching on.

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