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  • Writer's pictureElijah Ricks

In Real Life

For a few weeks now, Avey has been picking up on some of the subtle idioms and figures of speech we use. For example, lately she begins many of her questions with “In real life…” She might say something like, “Dad, in real life, do we eat vegetables?” It’s been funny to hear her ask questions as if most of the rest of her day is imaginary.

Here she is, apparently pretending that her own face is a canvas:

For another example, the other day during dinner, she requested that I ask her “animal questions.” So I asked her what kind of animal Snow White thought the logs were in a certain scene of the movie. After we established that they were alligators, Avey gave an empathetic expression and said, “And those alligators were sad because they couldn’t eat her.” I suppose that if the logs had been alligators, and the movie had not been a cartoon, and the story had been historical, the alligators may have, in fact, been disappointed to have lost a meal. Forgive me, but I find it hilarious that Avey puts herself in the head of a cartoon princesses’ hysterical hallucination. And on top of it, she feels bad for its insatiable craving for human flesh. Don’t get me wrong, she’s on Snow White’s side, but isn’t it cute that she wants everybody to be happy?


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