Carver must be going through a growth spurt. His cries for food are increasing in both frequency and intensity. The unfortunate consequence of nature is that I, the lowly father, have little to no direct impact on the child’s hunger. Kira tried to step out on an errand last night mostly just to get out of the house for a few minutes. That’s about when the man-child decided that he needed a serving of his favorite snack. So Kira can’t leave for a moment, and I can’t help the boy.
Something that became apparent to me this week is that having a child tends to take up a significant chunk of time out of one’s day. I bet if one were to rank the life events by how much time they suck out of one’s daily freedom, somewhere near the top would be “having a newborn”. Sadly, I venture to say that “graduate school” would not be too much farther down the list. I was spoiled that Carver was born just before Spring Break, as I was under the illusion that I might survive this semester with my sanity intact. However, now that school and work are back in full swing, doubts are creeping in. I realized recently that I am technically scheduled weekly for 10 hours at the Juvenile Probation Department (my job), 20 hours of teaching assistant duties (my other job), 5 hours of classroom time, with an additional 10 hours of readings and schoolwork, as well as 3 hours of meetings, and about 3 hours of commuting time. If my math is correct, that’s 51 hours scheduled into a normal week. Add on top of that my Fridays spent taking Avey out of the house for as long as possible so that Kira can have a moment tending only one child, and my schedule is pretty full. This is all before we factor in the time resources the boy demands.
Don’t misunderstand; I am not complaining. I just want to document clearly what these kids are doing to me to guilt them into putting me in the best home money can buy when the years of stress and lack of sleep have finally reduced me to the shadow of a human being that I am slowly but surely approaching.